Tuesday, January 16, 2007

"Natural Selection Speed Date" - 21st Century Eugenics for the IBanker Set


The blog Pocket Change advertises itself as "a First Class cabin journey into the depths of decadence," but a more appropriate destination of this "journey" is the depths of superficiality. With the help of New York Magazine, Pocket Change is presenting a speed dating event that is "exclusively available to qualified wealthy men and beautiful women."

As the site writes, "Pocket Change is honoring the age old union of wealthy men and hot girls. Society has taught us to not publicly acknowledge the obvious - no longer dear friends. Women want money in a man, men want beauty in a woman – this is a factual force of nature. Women don’t ask “So, what does he do for a living?” because they’re interested in his personality and guys don’t ask “is she hot?” because they’re concerned with character. Guys know that money buys them the car, the house and the trophy wife. This genetic cleansing is how the wealthy stays beautiful."

Genetic cleansing, eh? That phrase certainly has some positive connotations.

But let's get to the real heart of the issue. Why must we pretend to care about all those silly non-superficial traits, like intelligence, chemistry or sense of humor, when it's obvious that men and women only look for one thing in the opposite sex. Thank you, Pocket Change, for cutting to the chase!

What does it take to be qualified for such an event? Let me break it down:

Applicant Requirements For Men:

Solely based on wealth

Age 25 and below: $200K +
Age 26-30: 300K +
Age 30+: 500K +

or, you must have invested assets of $1 Mil + or a trust of $4 Mil +

Men will be asked to provide documented proof.

Ticket price: $500 (once accepted)

Application Requirements For Women:

Solely based on beauty

Must submit 5 pictures for judgment

Pictures are judged for beauty

No additional information is accepted

Ticket price: $50 (once accepted)

So who's in?


Anonymous said...

Do you think anyone really fills out their forms online? It just seems like such a joke!

Annie said...

This is too hilarious!
What single gal *isn't* looking for an investment banker? There are plenty in SF - maybe Pocket Change should do the same promo with San Francisco Magazine or 7X7?
Unfortunately, I don't think I'll pass the first round of screening. Who's got that much time to spend at the gym when they're out earning a living?
Oh, right. I won't need to earn a living if I do this... Hmmm. Compelling.